First of all, I apologize to all you folks that I can't get my act together to keep this blog consistent. I come up with great ideas, I really do, and then....I'm working, or Kate is playing with power cords and I need to stop her, or she needs to be fed, or she just needs her mom's lovin, or we're just livin life :).
So, to the blog. I hate tornado warnings/watches/winds, basically anthing to do with tornados. Even as a kid I can remember being terrified of them. Maybe it was that horror film "Wizard of Oz" that put the intial fear in me. Either way, I am not a fan. I know there are people out there, like Helen Hunt, who enjoy a good tornado chase, but I guarantee you won't ever find me in a pick up truck with Bill Paxton, running after a tornado.
Anyway, last night we had all the rain and winds and then finally, the tornado warning. I never experienced this in South Carolina, but in Texas, they have warning sirens that go off when there is severe weather in the area. Sometimes, when it gets really bad, there is a man's voice that starts talking over the loud speaker. The feeling I get when it starts actually reminds me of movies I've seen about Nazi camps in WWII. Seriously, it's crazy.
Around 9:30pm the sirens start going off. The scary man comes over the loud speaker and says "Take cover. Tornado warning." I wake Kate up and get her out of her crib, she squints up at me as though she was saying "is it already mornin, Mom?" We meet Becky (our friend that we live with) and the dogs in the laundry room. It was a sight, I'm sure. I'm in my jams, Kate's in hers, and Becky had just come in from working out - and we're all stuffed in the laundry room. I have to admit, I was scared. The wind was really loud...the rain was really coming down. I just kept imagining a tree falling right through the middle of the house and there we would be, sitting in the laundry room in our jammies. No bueno. No bueno at all. I just said aloud "Jesus, please keep us safe." Then Becky chimed in and just prayed for a few minutes for us and for the other people that were experiencing the same storm. It was a little unnerving, but just talking to Jesus calmed my heart. While we were sitting there, He gave me the thought that He knew about this storm, He knows how many more days I have and even how many days Kate has. The knowledge of that was comforting somehow in that scary moment. He continues to bring me back to the fact that He knows about my little life and that I'm here in Plano, TX, feeling very alone. He knows that I feel like I've been forgotten and that there are days when I just wish my Dad could come and pick me and Kate up in mom's old van and bring us back home. But, He also knows my heart and my dreams, my passions, my desires for my future.
The storm died down eventually and thankfully we did not have any problems to deal with because of it. Sometimes I feel as though I am living in a neverending storm. But, I find rest in the fact the there is a plan for my life. I am living that plan right now. This is part of it. My dad keeps telling me this is only a season of life. I want to take as much away from this time in my life as I can. I truly don't want to waste the precious time I have been given. Sometimes it is a choice to NOT be Debbie Downer. Today, I am making that choice. My family will be glad :)
A lot of people have thrown this verse out there for years and years as a cheesy cliche when life sucks, but either way, it is Truth. "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord. "Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you a hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11. Another good one is "Be still in the presence of the Lord and wait patiently for Him to act." Psalm 37:7a. To those of you out there in cyber land that are struggling in life, take some hope in the fact that Jesus loves you beyond comprehension and He wants great things for your life. It's really true.
Thanks to all who have taken the time to read. I really do appreciate it.
